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High-ass recipes: Baked Baked Potatoes

Ar 151229849
DGO staff

Where’s the actual potato in this Baked Baked Potato? That’s kiiiiinda the point.
Ar 151229849
DGO staff

Where’s the actual potato in this Baked Baked Potato? That’s kiiiiinda the point.

A friend once likened oatmeal to a canvas, merely a backdrop to what you choose to color it with. Baked potatoes are the same, with as many combinations as there are colors in the spectrum (and depending on how high your ass is, there just might be more colors available, as far as you know).

To me, every baked potato starts with a few core toppings: Butter, salt and pepper, sour cream and cheese. From there, you start looking around the kitchen to see what craziness you can pull off. Here, we have the BBQ Chili Dogless and the Broccoli & Bacon options.

What you need:

For the base

1 large russet potato

1 tablespoon butter

1/3 cup sour cream

1/3 cup shredded cheddar cheese

Salt and pepper to taste

BBQ Chili Dogless

½ can of your favorite canned chili (I like Amy’s Organic Spicy)

Zigzag of barbecue sauce

Zigzag of yellow mustard

Broccoli & Bacon

1 cup steamed broccoli

2-3 strips bacon, fried and crumbled

Directions

Poke a couple-few holes in the potato with a fork. I’m not sure what happens if you don’t do this because I’ve never not done it, but I think your house explodes. Cook the potato by pushing your microwave’s Baked Potato button (I don’t know who invented this, but they certainly had your high ass in mind when they did), or if you have four days to spare, bake it in the oven. Once cooked, cut the potato in half and mash it a bit with a fork. Slather with butter, salt and pepper and cheese (so it starts to melt just right). Follow with the sour cream and the rest of your toppings and then go to town with knife and fork and a good-sized napkin.

Ar 151229849

DGO staff

Where’s the actual potato in this Baked Baked Potato? That’s kiiiiinda the point.