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Dan Savage’s articles

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Savage Love: Sexual racism is alive and well in gay community

As a queer man of color – I’m Asian – I feel wounded whenever I am exposed to gay men in New York City, Toronto or any city where white gay men dominate. Gay men, mostly whites and Asians, reject me because of my race and no one admits to their sexual racism. I understand that sexual attraction is subconscious for many...

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Savage Love: What you do in the sack doesn’t prove you’re a feminist

I’m a 45-year-old straight male. Politically and socially, I consider myself an ardent feminist. There is nothing I enjoy more than giving a woman an orgasm or two. I’m very GGG and will cheerfully do whatever it takes. Fingers, tongue, cock, vibrator – I’m in. If it takes a long time, so much the better. I’m OK with all of...

Ar 160109764

Savage Love: What you do in the sack doesn’t prove you’re a feminist

I’m a 45-year-old straight male. Politically and socially, I consider myself an ardent feminist. There is nothing I enjoy more than giving a woman an orgasm or two. I’m very GGG and will cheerfully do whatever it takes. Fingers, tongue, cock, vibrator – I’m in. If it takes a long time, so much the better. I’m OK with all of...

Ar 160109764

Savage Love: What you do in the sack doesn’t prove you’re a feminist

I’m a 45-year-old straight male. Politically and socially, I consider myself an ardent feminist. There is nothing I enjoy more than giving a woman an orgasm or two. I’m very GGG and will cheerfully do whatever it takes. Fingers, tongue, cock, vibrator – I’m in. If it takes a long time, so much the better. I’m OK with all of...

Ar 160109764

Savage Love: What you do in the sack doesn’t prove you’re a feminist

I’m a 45-year-old straight male. Politically and socially, I consider myself an ardent feminist. There is nothing I enjoy more than giving a woman an orgasm or two. I’m very GGG and will cheerfully do whatever it takes. Fingers, tongue, cock, vibrator – I’m in. If it takes a long time, so much the better. I’m OK with all of...

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Savage Love: How to play out rape fantasy? Start by rethinking ‘rape’ label

I’m a straight 26-year-old man who wants advice on helping my fiancée realize a particular fantasy. We have been dating for three years and are in a happy monogamous relationship. I was always vanilla, but she enjoys rougher sex and light bondage. We’ve incorporated some of this into our sex lives, and we are both happy with...

Ar 151219678

Savage Love: How to play out rape fantasy? Start by rethinking ‘rape’ label

I’m a straight 26-year-old man who wants advice on helping my fiancée realize a particular fantasy. We have been dating for three years and are in a happy monogamous relationship. I was always vanilla, but she enjoys rougher sex and light bondage. We’ve incorporated some of this into our sex lives, and we are both happy with...

Ar 151219678

Savage Love: How to play out rape fantasy? Start by rethinking ‘rape’ label

I’m a straight 26-year-old man who wants advice on helping my fiancée realize a particular fantasy. We have been dating for three years and are in a happy monogamous relationship. I was always vanilla, but she enjoys rougher sex and light bondage. We’ve incorporated some of this into our sex lives, and we are both happy with...

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Savage Love: Should a cheating, HIV-positive husband be sent to jail?

I am a straight, married, 38-year-old woman. My husband and I have two children. I have been with my husband for 12 years, married for six. Three years after we were married, we found out that he was HIV positive. We had both had multiple tests throughout our relationship because of physicals and the process we went through...

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