Champagne is for suckers: Stop being lame and use these off-road hacks to make mimosas instead
The combination of champagne and orange juice is delicious, but it’s also (prepare yourselves) a kinda effing boring way to make a mimosa. Everybody makes a mimosa with OJ and champagne. Don’t you want to impress your friends? Don’t you want to be different? Of course you do. And that’s why you should try out some of these mimosa hacks to make sure your annoying friend Jackie is shut down and in awe of your skillz. Silly Jackie. She’ll never try to claim the brunch crown again.
Hack #1: Use classy ass PBR or some other cheap beer to make beermosas instead of champagne.You heard us. Or, read us. Whatever. There is nothing wrong with beermosas! You can even order them at El Rancho...or so we hear. All it takes to make one is a can of Pabst Blue Ribbon (we know you have it in the damn fridge) and a splash of orange juice. Throw it together and it’s freaking delicious, freaking cheap, and you won’t have that nasty headache from too much champagne. It’ll be a beer headache instead.
Hack #2: Winter it up because it’s weird to drink a summer drink in November.It’s cold outside. Really freaking cold. So maybe you should piggyback on that snowy wonderland feel with a cranberry mimosa, which feels epically more like a winter drink than the version with boring old OJ. All you have to do is add some white cranberry juice to your champagne instead of orange juice. It’s not brain surgery. Or, you can make apple-spiced mimosas. Basically, the gist of it is “see above,” but replace the cranberry with apple juice and spices instead. What spices? We don’t know. That’s what the Internet is for.
Hack #3: Make it a stiff as hell mimosa cocktail by adding liquor.Everything should be stiff as hell, including your mimosas. And that’s why you should be adding booze to your already alcohol-laden brunch drink. We’ve taken to putting a splash (or two) of vodka in our mimosas – Tito’s for the win – but you can pretty much use whatever your little mimosa-loving heart desires, including Grand Marnier. Just please do not add Everclear or hooch. That would be heinous.
Hack #4: Use Prosecco, sparkling hard cider, sparkling sake, or SOMETHING sparkling.Yes, we know it’s kinda sacrilege to even suggest to wine snobs that one replace champagne from the Champagne region of France with a sparkling wine – how déclassé – but they can just deal with it, cause ain’t nobody else care. Anyway, as with beer, you can use sparkling cider or sparkling sake instead of champagne, which sounds hella delicious to us. Just please do not use Mike’s Hard Lemonade, not because it won’t work, but because that junk is so frigging nasty.
Hack #5: Use a fancy ass beer, like a grapefruit beer, instead of champagne.Some of us keep PBR in the fridge, and others keep stuff like grapefruit beer in the fridge. Whatever your thing, man. And while you can (and should!) use PBR in your mimosas, you can also use your fancy craft beer instead of champagne. It’s especially rad to use fruit-infused beers for this weird mad scientist booze project, but if you want to use a Sapporo or (gag) an Old Chub, it’s your call. You do you with these mimosa hacks.
Hack #6: Hold the booze and make a Kombucha mimosa for the family or friends you hate.If you want to make a Kombucha mimosa with that sparkling health drink that is born of some weird food accident, we won’t stop you. It’ll work, but you’ll just be drinking something healthy instead of something filled with alcohol. This might be one to serve to your frenemies. We won’t tell.
For real tho, replacing champagne with Kombucha in your mimosa is rumored to clear up your hangover, so maybe drink this AFTER your beermosas, if you must try it at all. And then please report back. We need to know the facts.
Bonus Hack: Use Four Loko.We’re kidding. Please don’t drink Four Loko. The Internet advised us that Four Loko – the peach flavor in particular – would be a good substitute for your plain ol’ champagne, but we don’t think you should drink Four Loko because we love you. It’s kinda like how we don’t think you should drink lighter fuel. Neither are advisable by your friends at DGO.