File this one under a hard “nope.” Apparently the good folks at Denver’s Wynnkoop Brewery have decided a beer that tastes like hops, barley, and bull balls is a good thing.
That’s right. No bull ... here. Wynnkoop’s Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout is a thing, and it’s a thing you can drink. The roasted bull testicle brew first started out as an April Fool’s Day joke, but the brewery debuted it at Great American Beer Fest in 2012 and it inexplicably became a hit, so they just kept this bull ball business going, year after year.
Here’s how Wynnkoop Brewery describes the stout: “A meaty foreign-style stout, Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout is made with Colorado base malts, roasted barley, seven specialty malts, Styrian Goldings hops, and 25 pounds of freshly sliced and roasted bull testicles. Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout is an assertive, viscous stout with a rich brown/black color, a luscious mouthfeel and deep flavors of chocolate, espresso and nuts. The beer sports a savory, umami-like note and a roasty dry finish. Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout is 7.5% ABV and 3 BPBs. (That’s balls per barrel.)”
Anyway, the brewery releases a new batch of limited edition Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout every year, and according to Wynnkoop, it’s only made in “tiny 8-barrel batches (instead of our usual, already small 20-barrel batch),” so if you’re into roasted bull testicles, you should probably track some down before it’s gone. (Also, if you’re into this, there’s something wrong with you. Nobody should drink it.)