As I’ve refined my taste for weed, I’ve come to realize I prefer sativas much more than indicas. Indicas tend to make me paranoid and couch-locked to the point where I think if I move gravity will completely take over and stomp me into the ground. However, my preconceived notions were recently challenged, and it’s all thanks to our budtenders over at The Green House.
This week, we picked up a gram of Bubble Gum Skunk from said dispensary. Now, If you follow our reviews, you’ll know at this point that the folks at The Green House/Pagosa Therapeutics are definitely trying to kill us with their potent-ass weed and Bubble Gum Skunk is no exception.
But first, some background on Bubble Gum Skunk. This strain is an indica-dominant hybrid meant to offer both a mellow and euphoric high. What these buds don’t offer in looks, they more than make up for with their aroma – tangy notes of lemon. Our particular batch was sourced straight from Pagosa Therapeutics’ grow and came in at 29.7% THC.
I decided to smoke this strain after a particularly long day of work. Unfortunately, after tearing through my 420-friendly drawer I have hidden in my dresser, I discovered that I had somehow misplaced my pipe. As I was on a deadline for this review, I had to haul ass to the nearest dispensary before they closed and shell out for a new glass pipe. Disaster averted.
At that point in the evening I definitely needed a smoke, so I stepped outside to see what Bubble Gum Skunk could do.
This strain ended up being one of the smoothest smokes I’ve ever had. Zero coughing. None. Nada. It was so smooth, I quickly lost track of time and the high hit me like the ground had fallen out from under me. And it might as well have because I probably would not have noticed.
Unlike most indicas, this strain injected euphoria into my cold, dark soul. I had so much energy AND the munchies, which is probably not a good combination, because I started daydreaming about all the food I could cook. I stepped over to my oven and stared longingly at a box of noodles I was debating about cooking. In the end, I came to the (wise) conclusion that I was much too stoned to be using any kitchen devices other than a microwave, and even that seemed questionable.
Instead, I video called a friend on a whim and explained to them my dilemma. They live in a prohibition state and did not feel a whole lot of sympathy for me, so they mostly just laughed at my lack of ability to pay attention to anything going on. I had one helluva dry mouth – so much so that I felt like a mouth-breather on their first date. I had a pleasant buzzing in my ears and felt a full-body relaxation without the couch lock.
Eventually, my friend grew tired of me explaining how stoned I was and wondering what I should eat, and they ordered me to drink water and go to bed. I guzzled as much water as I could drink and (much to my sober shame) devoured a Hot Pocket while watching way too many episodes of “American Dad” before passing out on my couch like a champ.
My advice to you, fellow stoners, is this: Don’t be shy about tracking yourself down some Bubble Gum Skunk. It’s one smooth ride with the added bonus of actually being able to move around and do important things like make food. Just don’t use your oven.
Sir Blaze Ridcully