You should probably not watch the haunted car episode of “Paranormal Survivor” while stoned, cause it will lead you to think that Mötley Crüe’s frontman is possessing a badass red IROC-Z and you will end up laughing uncontrollably at someone’s ghostly Camaro pain.
You’ve probably gathered that this is a scenario that happened to me, as it’s very specific, and you’d be correct. The other night I smoked some Afghan Ghost – a fitting strain for a show about bullshit hauntings – and then flipped on that cheesy Netflix show. It was either the best idea I’ve ever had, or the worst. I’m going with best.
I got said Afghan Ghost from The Green House in Pagosa Springs. If you’re unfamiliar with Afghan Ghost, here’s some info: it’s an indica-heavy strain that’s a cross of Ghost OG and Afghani #1, and it reeks, as one would suspect, like a freaking skunk. I put it on my desk this morning to snap a photo and it caused the entire DGO office to smell like we’d been hotboxing it. The nugs are tight, dense, and surprisingly sticky, and it only gets more skunky when you grind it up, which I did before throwing it in a pipe.
I half expected this strain to taste heavy and ashy given that it’s pretty noxious, but I was surprised to find that it was pretty pleasant. Tasted like weed. /shrug
It also acted like weed, and it did so very, very quickly. I smoked this strain with Blaze, our other occasional weed reviewer, and we were both blazed (heh) within five minutes of cashing the bowl. That’s about the time I decided to flip on a show about people surviving evil ghost hauntings because, well, it’s creepy and I like being weirded out. Only problem is that “Paranormal Survivor” is not creepy after a little Afghan Ghost. It’s borderline hilarious instead.
There we were, trying to get into a totally plausible story about a haunted IROC-Z that kept screwing with its owner, when the giggles hit. Ghost appears in the window of the house? Funny. Dead-faced Mötley Crüe member behind the wheel of a Camaro staring down the owner and his girlfriend? Even funnier. At one point, Blaze tried to relate with the idea of haunted possessions, saying “Sometimes I think my bookcase is a person.” It didn’t help. It only sent me off on another spell of gut-busting laughter because what the actual hell, Blaze. (By the way: If you’re wondering what the conclusion to that episode was, here it is. A psychic told the dude his IROC was haunted by the ghost of a motorcycle gang member. And yes, that was just as funny to me.)
Things got even more insane when the next episode came on and it was a clear ripoff of Freddy Krueger, down to the cheesy ass mask. I don’t know how that’s not like, copyright infringement or something, but I’m clearly not an attorney.
The night continued this way until we all became engrossed in a show about bees and honey. Did you know you’re essentially ingesting a bunch of bee spit when you eat honey? Bee spit is pretty horrifying but science is so cool.
Afghan Ghost is cool too, especially if you want to laugh so hard your abs hurt the next day. Grab some of this stuff, flip on a cheesy ghost show, and then go to town. You won’t regret it.
DGO Pufnstuf
