If you’re into conspiracy theories and the like, it’s a great time to take a gander at the opposite corner of Colorado.
For the past three weeks, people in northeastern Colorado and southwestern Nebraska have been reporting fleets of drones showing up at dusk, flying in a grid pattern, doing who knows what. And people are starting to get worried.
The New York Times reported Monday that a multi-agency task force made up of federal, state and local officials has been formed to figure out what the heck is going on. The task force will be led by Dave Martin, the sheriff of Morgan County, Colorado.
Around 77 federal, state and military agencies, including the Federal Aviation Administration, which released a statement saying it has no idea where the drones are coming from, attended a meeting Monday.
Sheriff Carlton Britton of Sedgwick County, Colorado, told the Times the drones have blinking aviation lights five feet apart, fly in an east-west pattern, and sound like “flying lawn mowers.”
Unidentified objects flying over a rural area has naturally spawned talk of private citizens trying to shoot the drones down – a bad idea for a number of reasons, including that they might miss and hit something else (that bullet has to go somewhere) or that a riled-up, trigger-happy gun owner will successfully shoot something that isn’t one of the drones.
To find out what the drones could possibly be looking at, this writer asked his editor, who used to drive that corridor on a regular basis, what’s over there.
“It’s literally just ag and cow shit,” she replied. “Like literal cow shit.”
Whatever the drones are looking at, it must not be something visible with the naked eye. After all, they’re flying at night and not shining lights on anything, otherwise that would be noted in reports.
My best guess: The lizard people long rumored to live in the massive complex of underground tunnels beneath Denver International Airport have found a new way to convert gases produced by decomposing manure into a powerful energy source. And they’re using drones and thermal imaging to map out locations to capture it, so they can fuel their ships and rejoin their civilization inside the hollowed-out moon.
Nick Gonzales
