There is nothing chill about Kaviar’s Moon Rocks. Nothing. Nada. Finito. No chill. These wretched, beautiful little things are an amalgam of every cannabis product known to man: They are a Sour Diesel nug that’s been dipped in hash oil and then completely coated in kief. That’s right; they’re deadly.
Or, if not deadly, very, very strong. I was warned to only smoke a rice-grain sized amount, and I’ll tell you right now that was the right move.
Portion size aside, these moon rocks are interesting little creatures. When I opened up the tiny glass container, I was immediately knocked back by the smell. For such a tiny nugget, moon rocks sure are dank. It also looks like a moon rock, if moon rocks were green-flecked and covered in pollen.
I tried my little hunk out on a dab rig – grinding the “caviar” to smoke will cause you to lose all that good kief – and I needed the heat from the rig to properly vaporize the oil and kief. It was a messy idea. Unlike straight wax or shatter, the flower part of the moon rock turned black from the heat, and it left a sticky residue on my nail. But, that’s what sinks are for, I guess.
Messy or not, the method was effective. Once I tossed that caviar onto the nail, it immediately turned to cool white vapor. Pretty rad.
One of the other cool things about moon rocks is the taste. The mixture of herb, oil, and kief yields an earthy, pleasant taste, and because it’s so light, you have to avoid the temptation of smoking more than a small amount at a time. Overdoing it on this caviar would not be good.
I mean that. Even good ol’ smokey veteran Snoop Dogg damn near had his face in his lap (and what I mean by that is he nearly fell over on himself, but the Dre reference sounded better) after smoking some. I am not Snoop, but after one hit, I was so dizzy that I wasn’t sure I wanted to get up to get ice cream. I risked it, of course, because I can’t resist the temptation of snacks, but it probably wasn’t the safest idea. Going from zero to stoned kinda throws off your equilibrium, and stumbling around the kitchen is not the way to go. I cannot imagine what would have happened had I smoked a couple of rounds back to back.
And, after the initial dizziness subsided, I found myself beyond stoned. Perhaps that’s because moon rocks contain somewhere around – or at times over – 50 percent THC. That could be why. It was a euphoric high, one that encompassed my entire body, from my head to my toes. It infiltrated my brain, making it nearly impossible to continue reading the reddit thread I’d been on prior, but that’s what cartoons are for, right?
It wasn’t too long before I passed out in a haze, arm over my eyes to block out the midday sun. I woke up a few hours later, still stoned, and hungry as hell. Good times.
Listen, I like these moon rocks, but they are not for new smokers or the faint of heart. They’re also not for the people who procrastinate on getting pre-stoned snacks from the kitchen. Things could turn out quite badly. Everyone else? Have at it.
DGO Pufnstuf
