I decided earlier this week that if I had to save just one city in Texas it would be Houston. Someone out there would save lame ass San Antonio, but not me. I would save Houston. It’s lowkey way cooler than Austin, which takes itself a little too seriously these days, and Dallas? Psh. Let’s not even go there. Why was I thinking about what Texas cities were worth my apocalyptic intervention, you ask? Well, we can just blame it on an overabundance of Texas-related coronavirus news and a little weed strain called MAC, which is new on the shelves at Prohibition Herb.
Before I bury my foot in my mouth with the Texas transplants any further though, let’s talk about what MAC is. This strain is a hybrid that was created by crossing Alien Cookies x Colombian x Starfighter, which is why it’s named MAC. It’s an acronym for Miracle Alien Cookies. This particular batch tested at 28.84% THC, which is probably why my brain fell down a huge rabbit hole and started contemplating the superiority of major cities in Tejas. Cause I was super freaking high after I smoked it.
Funny thing is, I only smoked half a bowl, too — but that half a bowl (which was admittedly smoked out of a bong, so that may have added to it) was quite enough to knock me on my literal ass. Before I get to that, though, I’d like to comment a bit on how smooth this strain was. I didn’t cough or choke at all while smoking it, even though I was using a bong (which usually makes me gag like a child eating peas). I was also really pleased with how it tasted — nothing burnt or unappealing at all. It was just a smooth, easy ride.
The high, on the other hand, was a batshit crazy one. I started out feeling pretty mellow and amused, but that descended very quickly into “so far into my own head I’m borderline losing it” territory. To be clear, that was losing it in a good way. I kept thinking about everything — my thoughts were all over the place, and I was definitely borderline talking to myself in my own head at one point. I was so deep into the cavernous spaces of my brain that I was amused by everything — especially the idea of ranking Texas’ cities from best to worst. Go figure.
I also had a raging body and head high, which was evident by the fact that I thought at one point that I was wearing shoes on the couch. I wasn’t — that’s gross (fight me; it is) — but my brain was playing tricks on me to the point that I felt like my feet were secured in sturdy ass shoes, all wrapped up and comfy. I was in socks — why wear shoes when you literally can’t go anywhere ever — but if I’d had to guess, I would have SWORN there were shoes on my feet.
I also felt like there were waves of energy flowing out of my brain and into my body. I could feel literal waves of “energy” flowing, like I was some Marvel character with the dumbest ass superpower ever. “Let me just stop this villain with my super powerful energy waves of nonsense!” To say it was a body high is to really undercut what was happening.
The housemate that I smoked with, on the other hand, was convinced that she could feel waves of heat or like, something, flowing up from her chest into her throat. I was keenly aware that this wasn’t happening because, well, it wasn’t, but I definitely knew what she was alluding to. This strain was a mind eff if I’ve ever seen one.
It was also extremely fun. I laughed and laughed at nothing for what felt like hours. Oddly enough, though, I didn’t crash hard afterward like I would with some other strains that lead to body highs. The effects of MAC came on hard and fast but had a slow descent from super stoned to mostly sober and super hungry. So rather than sleep, I ate a bunch of food (everyone’s favorite pastime right now) and watched “Dumb and Dumber” until I decided it was time to go to bed.
So, yeah. Houston > Every other Texas city, but I would have told you that sober. I would also tell you while sober that you should invest in this strain, if for nothing else than a few hours of unabashed amusement. That shit is hard to come by right now while we’re all locked in our proverbial castles, but MAC will help you right out. Just don’t smoke it and start ranking Colorado cities. All that will do is start a war, and we all know which ones are best anyway. 😉
DGO Pufnstuf
