Weed Review: Kief joints aren’t for pansies

by DGO Pufnstuf

As you may have gathered from the headline, this week we are reviewing a little thing called kief joints from our friends at Prohibition Herb. As you may have ALSO gathered, kief joints are not for pansies. How do we know this? We smoked one. They’re really effing strong. Found out the hard way.

But before we get into that, let’s get the informative part out of the way. If you’re unfamiliar with kief, here’s what it is, according to Wikipedia, the most credible source on Earth: “Kief, meaning ‘pleasure, intoxication,’ refers to the resinous trichomes of cannabis that may accumulate in containers or be sifted from loose, dry cannabis flower with a mesh screen or sieve. Kief contains a much higher concentration of psychoactive cannabinoids, such as THC, than that of the cannabis flowers from which it is derived.”

In other words, kief is the pollen-looking residue that collects in the bottom of your grinder. You can smoke it or sprinkle it on your weed, and it makes things really fun, cause it has a boatload of THC and other cannabinoids.

I took the advice of the smarty pants from inventory and went for a joint rolled with Jolene OG, a strain I reviewed several months ago and really liked. Well, friends. Between the bud and the 30 percent kief layered in, this was not Jolene OG like I remembered it. This is Jolene OG on copious amounts of Red Bull. This is your friend Jolene after she drinks 17 cheap beers and decides White Snake karaoke is a good idea, and you end up having to drag her off stage because she started scream-singing into the mic.

I smoked the kief joint with a friend on a Friday night after we’d had about three beers each. We had slightly lowered inhibitions, which led to us going in hard and smoking the entire joint between the two of us. I have no idea why we’re so stupid.

I knew halfway through that I should stop, but I didn’t. I could feel my head ballooning up and my body getting high-as-hell numb, but I just kept smoking, and getting higher…and higher…and higher. Part of the problem is that this strain tastes really great, so it wasn’t a challenge to get through the whole thing. Let’s blame it on that.

We passed the joint back and forth for what felt like an eternity, and once we’d finally conquered it, I couldn’t move my mouth. I just silently stumbled inside, my head spinning and body uncooperative, and dished out a huge bowl of ice cream. Then I passed out face down on my bed without eating any of it, but NOT before I texted my friend, who was sitting on the couch alone and high, the words: “Too high. Cannot do it. Better off dead.” I woke up confused as hell a few hours later and had to deal with the mess from my melted ice cream.

I don’t know why I didn’t pace myself. Maybe I had something to prove. Maybe I thought it would be funny. MAYBE I shouldn’t drink ANY beers before doing these reviews so I don’t think I’m big balls and can smoke that much. Who knows.

Would I smoke this kief joint biz again? Uh, yeah I would. It tasted delicious and got me very high. It would be a great way to get a lot of people stoned for $14. Would I smoke the ENTIRE thing again between two people? Hell no. I don’t have a death wish, and I prefer my ice cream in solid form.

DGO Pufnstuf

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