I’m not going to lie: I feel a little weird as an adult relaying my experience eating a lollipop to other adults. To top it off, a THC-infused lollipop, though I’m not sure if that makes it better or worse.
In any case, we’re starting off on the wrong foot here. Hi, I’m Blaze and I just ate a weed sucker for the first time in my life. And I rather enjoyed it.
To be honest with you, I’ve become a bit tired of the gummy edible routine. Yes, they are delicious and amazing. Will I ever stop eating them? No. Am I looking to try something new in between? Yes. Thus, after going back and forth on it for weeks, I finally gave in and got myself a Canyon Lick It lollipop in the flavor of strawberry lemonade. Canyon also has flavors in sour boysenberry, caramel apple, lavender lemonade, and sour grape.
One of the fun things about edibles is that you get to enjoy the sweets of your childhood (and hopefully your adulthood) with the added exhilaration of being stoned afterward. This deliciously sweet treat reminded me of when my mom would drive us to the bank and occasionally the teller would give us some free lollipops. I’m not sure WHY I only associate lollipops with banks now. But, there you have it.
Each of Canyon’s Lick It lollipops comes packed with 10 mg of THC. And, voila! You can’t even taste it! Just sweet nourishing sugar and weed.
For some reason, I felt it was appropriate to sit outside on my patio sucking on this thing. That is until I made really awkward eye contact with a neighbor just trying to enjoy a beer and I realized it might look a little odd to an outsider that I was enjoying that lollipop so much.
So back inside I went to finish this thing off in private. Don’t be gross.
I then planned to spend the rest of my afternoon watching “Marcella” on Netflix and try my best to ignore the fireworks blasting outside my apartment. Not very exciting, I know, but in my defense, they’d been going off loooooong before that. Stoned or sober, I’d had my fill of explosions for the rest of the year.
Besides, this edible had lifted my mood and lulled me into a deep sense of relaxation that one can only find while lazily lounging on their couch stoned in the middle of a Saturday. I was one with the couch in a way that some people might compare to feeling one with nature. But not I. I was going to merge my stoned self with my couch until I inevitably took an afternoon nap. Things were going great.
What actually ended up happening in the middle of watching “Marcella” was me losing my mind when I heard a loud “thunk” from somewhere in my home. As a child who grew up watching “Matlock” with their mother, I have firmly held to the belief that one day someone is going to try to murder me. It’s also why I have a bat hidden next to my bed, though I have no doubt it won’t do me any good in the event of an actual break-in.
But I digress. Where was I? Oh yes, stoned as hell and peeling off my couch so I could defend myself from the “thunk.”
Not to worry though, friends. There was not a stranger hiding in my home waiting for the perfect moment to strike. My OxiClean White Revive had simply fallen off its precarious place on the shelf and spilled all over. No murderer, but a massive mess to clean up and I wasn’t sure I had enough brainpower to operate a vacuum just then. Good thing my edible had left me in a good mood!
So, what I’m trying to say is that Canyon Lick It lollipops will probably not help you should you find yourself in a precarious situation. In fact, it might not even be very helpful when you’re faced with a mess. But, if you’re looking for a sugary edible that will make you feel like a million bucks no matter what is going on in your life, you might want to find yourself some of these suckers.
Sir Blaze Ridcully
