“Why does it reek of skunk in here?”
That’s a question I was asked VERY impolitely by family over the holidays, and I knew immediately what they were referring to when it was asked. It reeked like a skunk in my kitchen because of Jungle Cake, an indica-leaning strain of weed that I was photographing for this review.
I hadn’t really planned on telling my entire family that I was photographing Jungle Cake for a story, mostly because I didn’t want to share, but I also hadn’t expected the four small nugs of bud in the container to smell like a skunk had sprayed my entire kitchen from the floor to the ceiling, either. I knew once the lid was popped, though, that I had no choice but to let other people imbibe, because it was clear what I was doing from the noxious fumes that were emitted from those four nugs. No hiding it. None.
So, I did what any good pot reviewer would do when faced with explaining the stench: I yelled “I’m PHOTOGRAPHING SOMETHING FOR WORK!” and then quickly shoveled the tiny green nugs back into their plastic home, hell-bent on diverting the attention away from my prized possession.
It did not work, friends. I was caught, and in the spirit of Christmas (or some shit), I decided to load a bowl and let the adults in my household partake. Was it a good idea? Yes and no. It was a good idea in that this strain was awesome and everyone got really mellow and stoned, but it was a bad idea in that I quickly ran through my gram of Jungle Cake thanks to those thieves. And, because this strain was so good, I’m going to be forced to shell out $20 on a replacement gram, which I will hide from any and everybody because it’s MINE THIS TIME THANKS.
Anyway, I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s talk about Jungle Cake a bit. This strain is not one I normally see on the shelf at the dispensaries I frequent, so I was obviously intrigued as to what it was like well before the photo debacle. I’d heard that this strain smelled tangy and sweet, but that was a lie because it smelled like a mix of skunk spray and earthy mud. I’d also heard that this strain would make me the happiest person on earth, and luckily, that other part was true.
We lit up a bowl and passed it around, and I’d only gotten my share of a couple hits before it was evident. We went from a bunch of sad sack family members who’d had enough of the holidays to people who could not, despite their best efforts, wipe the shit-eating grins off our faces. I felt like my smile had been hard-wired into my soul, and every time I’d try to drop the corners of my mouth from the weird clown smile I was sporting, they’d pop right back up into that same grin. Looking around, it was clear that everyone in the room was being affected in a similar manner. We all had the same dopey, embarrassing grin plastered across our mugs.
Shortly after the grin appeared, I started to feel super smart and like I could decode anything. It started after I flipped on the new(er) version of the “Jungle Book” as background noise, and found myself searching for the underlying meaning of King Louie’s henchmen. I was also very irritated at Christopher Walken’s rendition of Louie, but I’ll save that for another rant. (It was a terrible choice, Disney.)
I know we ended up in a super deep conversation about the casting choices and the deeper meaning of the film, but I’ll be honest with you, friends. I kinda zoned out and don’t really remember what was said. I was too busy shoveling a leftover baked potato in my mouth to really care. I’d already solved all the world’s problems in my own brain at that point and decided – uncontested – that Christopher Walken was a crap choice for King Louie. I didn’t need any more discussion about it.
By the way: we went through all of the bud for this review in that one night, which is both annoying and impressive, but also really speaks to what Jungle Cake was like. It worked for every diverse personality in the group, and trust me when I say there are a ton of personalities in that group. It should not have worked, but it did.
Jungle Cake is a great strain, and it didn’t even force me into a deep ass slumber like most indicas do. I was awake, insightful, and really annoyed at Christopher Walken. What more could a person ask for?