We live for the weekend, but not because we want to paint the town red at night. Oh no. It’s all about brunch, kids. And you know what makes brunch so glorious? Well, we’re glad you asked. Yes, the bread pudding, eggs Benedict, and chicken and waffles are to die for, but it’s the booze-filled beverages that can make or break one’s brunchy time.
Spice up that boring old orange juice. Breakfastize your margarita. Don’t just wake up with a plain cup of coffee – spike that shit. The options are endless for you booze-heads looking to savor your one last day off before the Monday grind or deal with your family out in public, and we’re here for it. Down the hatch, brunchers!
Bloody MaryAh, the classic breakfast juice. The cure to any boring brunch. It’s not every day that your drink comes with basically an entire meal. You basically don’t even have to order food with these babies (but you will anyway). Pickles (they better not be sweet), bacon, olives, garlic, peppers, tomatoes, cheese, celery, A CHEESEBURGER – you can literally (and we mean that) put anything on these glorious fountains of booze. Just be sure to order more than one.
MimosaIf you’re going to stumble into brunch as hungover as it gets, you best start pounding these right away. Orange juice to wash away the filthy taste in your mouth, and champagne to take the edge off your pounding headache. We guess you can mix it up to some other citrus-y juice like pineapple or mango, by why would you do that? We vote classic glass of sunshine on this one.
Irish coffeeWe’re addicted to coffee, as any normal human is, but we know every now and then even coffee needs a good booze boost. Or, maybe you’re someone who HAS to spike your coffee with some hooch in the morning to get through the workday. We don’t know your life! If you’re looking for that something special with caffeine in it, warm, rich Irish coffee, with its whiskey, sugar, and cream is a good place to start. It’ll help you wake up AND drown out the chaos that’s threatening to bring you down.
BelliniIf you can’t get away with having wine for breakfast, what, I ask, is the point of life? Not to fear, though. With a healthy helping of bellini, not only do you get your daily dose of wining, but you also get a nice little side of fruit…kind of. I mean, the peach purée counts, right? Anyway, what we’re trying to say is don’t let anyone judge you for getting your wine on before noon.
Breakfast margaritaWhat’s better than a regular ass margarita, you ask? Well, DUH…the breakfast version. If there’s ever a time for needless celebration, the time is now. Brace thine taste buds for the cutthroat flavor of tequila and choose your rim flavor wisely (salt). If you’re like us, though, and just the smell of tequila gives you the sudden case of uncontrollable gag reflexes (damn you, college!) there are plenty of combinations you can seek out to drown out the flavor. There’s even such thing as a bellini margarita, if you must go there.
SangriaYou really can’t go wrong with this fruity little crowd pleaser, which is, once again, a win for the winos. With red wine and fruit and maybe even a little brandy, it’s a perfect way to wake up and kick-start brunch. Plus, with all that fruit, it’s a great excuse to order as many carbs as your heart desires. Well, we think so anyway.
Spiked iced teaWe’ve already established that you can jazz up any regular ol’ drink into an alcoholic beverage of your dreams, so it shouldn’t come as any surprise that if you can do this with coffee, you can do it to iced tea. Vodka. Bourbon. Rum. Gin. ANY liquor pairs well with tea if you really want it to. Plus, if you’re not a big fan of coffee, this can stand is as your alternative caffeine-infused booze boost to start your day.
— Amanda Push
