Rocky Mountain Funnel Cake Factory is the sugary key to our cold, dead hearts

by Amanda Push

It was a gloomy weekend in Durango, filled with rain, clouds, and next to no sun. Everything was wet and dreary, and it was a sad reminder that summer will be over come the end of September.

It was these conditions that inspired our trip to our neighbors up north in Silverton. If you’ve never taken US-550 N from Durango, you are missing out on some of the best views southwest Colorado has to offer. The jagged cliffs, endless amounts of trees, and dipping canyons are enough to make you almost forget that you’re driving on one of the most dangerous roads in the area. Just look down.

Needless to say, all that driving made us hungry enough to swing by Rocky Mountain Funnel Cake Factory in downtown Silverton before we headed back to Durango after a day of exploring. Before you jump in the car, though, you should know that the aromas of this delightful eatery are intoxicating. The smell of fried bread mixed with powdered sugar, chocolate, peanut butter, cream cheese, and fruit is enough to make you salivate before your foot passes ever through the front door. It’s overpowering, to say the least.

When we arrived, the shop was already filled with happy faced customers digging into their just desserts. Everyone was leaned over, tearing at the cakes with their knives and forks. A few less bashful were just using their hands. This was clearly a judgment-free zone. There was not one disappointed patron among them. You might go in tired and hangry, but it’s impossible, we learned, to leave the Funnel Cake Factory unhappy.

When we got to the register, the team behind the counter was anxious to share their treats, and boy, there are a lot of them on the menu. Black forest. Cherry cheesecake. Peanut butter cup. Pecans, pralines, and cream. It took us a moment to gain our composure. They all sounded too good to pass up. We eventually landed on black forest and strawberry cheesecake. We’d heard good reviews on the black forest cake, which included cherry sauce, hot fudge, and powdered sugar. Strawberry cheesecake came with a strawberry sauce, cream cheese, and powdered sugar sprinkled over the fried cake.

The best part? We didn’t have to break the bank to enjoy these delicious desserts. This isn’t like buying food at an amusement park. You won’t have to dip into your savings account to try one of these delicious funnel cakes. It’s just $7.75 for specialty cakes, while a classic, simple dish is just $6.25 a pop.

Dear readers, we cannot emphasize enough how much self control it took not to rip our to-go boxes away from our funnel cakes and go at them like hyenas over a fresh kill. We resisted, though, and handed over our payment while smiling like sane humans until we set foot out of the shop. Then we went to town – as in we sat in our vehicle and shoved so much funnel cake down our gullets that we’re pretty sure we stopped breathing at one point.

There are few foods in life more pleasurable than bread – fried bread covered in sugar in particular. The crispy, hot carbs were the perfect texture and struck a delicate balance between the viscous sauces and thick breading holding it all together.

Black forest is, in general, a great mixture of flavors, and this funnel cake was no exception. The dark chocolate paired well with the cherry sauce, and we couldn’t stop dipping the cake into the generous amount of sugary syrup heaped on top. Strawberry cheesecake was also a solid pick. Can you really go wrong scraping up strawberry sauce and cream cheese with your last bits of funnel cake? No. No, you cannot.

We left Silverton happy, and most likely weighing a few extra pounds of happiness – just like the other shop patrons. Farewell for now, Funnel Cake Factory. We’ll be back soon to devour the rest of your menu.

Rocky Mountain Funnel Cake Factory is located at 1249 Greene Street in Silverton. They are open seasonally from May until October. For more information, call 479-739-0997 or visit their Facebook page.Amanda Push

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