Strain review: Reba

by DGO Pufnstuf

I have a theory that Pagosa Therapeutics is trying to see juuuuust how high they can get Sir Blaze Ridcully and me. Is there a contest or a bet going on, you guys? Cause y’all have conquered that task efficiently, time and time again.

This week, we tackled a flower strain called Reba, which we picked up from the dispensary during a break in the snowpocalypse. No ditches for us, thanks! Reba is a bit of a mystery to me – I’d never heard of it, never smoked it, and I’m not even sure of its origins. I know, I know … slacker. What did you expect from a chronic pothead?!

But while I don’t really know much about this strain of flower, what I DO know is that despite this babe being around 17 percent THC, it kicked my ass. It kicked my ass so hard. (Do their strains ever do anything otherwise?) It also kicked Blaze’s ass … which, to be fair, isn’t really that hard. But still.

I recently misplaced my dry herb vape (probably while smoking one of Pagosa’s deadly strains), so we had to go old school on this one and smoke it out of a freaking pipe like plebs. It had been so long since I’d smoked out of a regular ass glass pipe that it was almost like having to relearn the process.

And Sir Blaze, who got so high off of like, three hits of Reba that they couldn’t figure out how to use the freaking lighter. I was dying inside AND outside because I was laughing so hard. Some people are the best-worst, and Blaze is one of them.

So, in the midst of trying to take notes for this review and smoke the bowl, I also had to light Blaze’s bowls. Does that tell you where we’re going with this? E’rybody in the garage gettin’ tipsy … erh, stoned. Super stoned.

I don’t have many notes from the beginning of this Reba journey because I had to hand-hold someone who couldn’t use a lighter, but my notes from the post-garage time frame are brilliant. Wanna see? Sure you do. Here goes:

1. “That feeling when you hit exit on the remote instead of enter. Insert two crying emojis here.”

2. My legs are getting high.

3. “My head just got real high and Blaze can barely talk. Blaze is singing instead.”

4. I can hear myself chewing.

5. I wonder why I hear the drums so prominently every time I’m stoned.

6. “Frère Jacques bullshit.” Insert two laughing emojis.

7. “Time goes so slow. I’m going to send everyone “Schitt’s Creek” gifs.

So, as you can tell, I was only borderline coherent after Reba, which was fine by me. I was so over driving in the snow, and watching the snow, and trudging through the snow, and cursing the snow … Reba sending me into stoned oblivion was a welcome refuge, even with my apparent overuse of note-emojis.

I’d ask Blaze their thoughts on this strain, but I’m like 85 percent sure there is no recollection of that time frame for them. So I’ll skip the dual review on this one and just go with what I learned, which was that Reba and its mystery origins is awesome. I don’t really care where this strain came from cause it’s great. Anything that gets me outer space-stoned and turns Blaze into a human puddle is just fine by me.

DGO Pufnstuf

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