What’s in the (monthly subscription smoker) box?!!!!

by DGO Pufnstuf

Ever wondered what comes inside those subscription and mystery stoner boxes? The ones that claim to be filled with all sorts of unique glassware, smoking accessories, and other gadgets?

Yep, we have, too — and we decided to do something about it.

In a bid for answers, we ordered basically all of the subscription smoker boxes — we’re talking Hemper, Elevated Stash, Hippie Butler, Sensi Box, and whatever else we found online when we were blazed — and decided to rate them for you as they arrived.

Thanks to our blazed-face purchases, we have all the details for what actually comes in these boxes, what the price tag is to snag them and tell you whether it’s worth or not we think it’s worth the hassle, and the shekels, to purchase these baddies.

This is our second round of the subscription smoker box gauntlet, and we’ll keep the info coming for as long as the boxes arrive.

This month, we have a (spoiler alert) freaking AWESOME box to review for you. It’s the SensiBox from Spiced Up, which is marketed as a “lifestyle smoking subscription box,” whatever that means.

SensiBox subscriptions come in two options: the Original SensiBox, which promises seven items every month for $39, or the SensiLight Box, which comes
with five items for $24.

We felt like being big ballers to the max with this box, so we sprung for the extra $25 box to get the Original SensiBox.

What’s cool about these boxes is that they’re supposed to be hand-curated to include the company’s own exclusive glass and pipe designs.

As with some of the other stoner box subscription options, each Sensibox delivery contains glass and smoker essentials.

Here’s what the deal is with this box.

What the box promised: Per the SensiBox website, “Unwrap a SensiBox and be amazed at the cool awesomeness inside each box. We take pride in hand-curating every box, including our very own exclusive designs. Feel the SensiBox Love!”

What actually came in the box: A blunt cutter, a package of two Crop Kingz premium organic wraps, a glass chillum, an Art of Smoke carrying case, a silicone dinosaur edibles DIY mold, the best freaking DINOSAUR PIPE we have ever seen, a dinosaur sticker and toy, and an Art of Smoke dinosaur bag to
carry it in

Here’s the breakdown:

– Blunt cutter: Retails for maybe $5?

– Crop Kingz premium organic wraps: Retails for $2

– Glass chillum: Retails for $5

– Art of Smoke carrying case: Retails for maybe $5?

– Silicone dinosaur edibles mold: Retails for

– The best freaking dinosaur pipe we’ve ever laid eyes on: Retails for $20

– Art of Smoke dino carrying bag: Retails for maybe $3?

Estimated value by SensiBox: No idea; it isn’t disclosed Maximum total value as calculated by my bad math: $40

My estimate of the actual value: Thanks to that dinosaur pipe? PRICELESS.

My overall satisfaction level with the Original SensiBox: 15 out of 5 Juicy J rolling papers

My quick review: Listen. I’m going to sound either insane or biased here, but when it comes to smoker subscription boxes, I would say that the contest is over. Done with. Finito. Call it. SensiBox wins. And it’s all because of a damn dinosaur pipe.

I had literally no idea what to expect when I ordered this box. In fact, I just basically googled “smoker subscription box” when we started this little experiment and SensiBox was one of the options that popped up.

What is supposed to set SensiBox apart from the competition is that the boxes are themed. Each month comes with a cutesy card and design, and you don’t know what you’re gonna get till you get it. That’s kind of the point of these boxes, I guess.

Anyway, as of the time I am writing this review, I have received two boxes from this company: one in August and one in September. I opted not to review the
August box last month because it made me irrationally angry.

That’s because for August, my SensiBox was snail-themed, and it was dumb. It had a weird snail pipe, some other dumb junk I can’t remember, and overall,
I was less than impressed.

I even thought about canceling my subscription because I did not want to be forced to write about a stupid glass snail pipe. It looks dumb, it is dumb, and I hate it. Sorry. The only reason I did not cancel it is that I said I would review all of these boxes. And, I also forgot to do it.

I’m glad I did, though, because that irrational disdain changed when this month’s box arrived. In fact, this month’s box was such a freaking banger, I have nothing but love and devotion for this box.

So, last month’s snail box was a bust, but this month? WELL. This month the box was dinosaur-themed, and let me tell you whut (said in Hank Hill’s voice),
I’m obsessed, Bobby. Flat-out obsessed.

I listed out the box contents above, but I just want to go over them again here. First thing I saw in the box was a dino-themed edibles mold, and I started to get a little excited. My hopes were up. I’ll never make edibles at home, but like, it’s not the worst thing to receive.

The second thing I saw was the got dang best pipe I have ever seen. It’s a blue dinosaur and it is epic.

And, when I say this thing is awesome, I mean it. It’s so unbelievably heavy — and the design is perfect. I don’t have a single pipe like it. I want to display it
on my freaking desk in my office. That’s how cool it is.

Between that thing and the edibles mold, I was stoked.

And then I dug further into the box and found the tiny little styrofoam weed leaves. THEY PUT WEED LEAVES IN THE PACKAGING, you guys!

Freaking insane.

But, if I’m being fair and balanced, I should tell you that I was less sold on the rest of the junk in the box, mosts of which was hidden beneath those styrofoam pot leaves.

As I noted above, SensiBox ships out seven different items with the original box. And, there were indeed seven different smoker items in my box. But aside from the dino pipe and the dino mold, they were mostly useless.

For starters, the cigar cutter is not something I need. I have like 14 of them on my shelf, and none of them have ever been touched. I guess I could regift the thing to someone else, but I don’t even know anyone who smokes cigars or rolls Philly blunts. Hit me up if you want it, I guess.

And, I felt the same way about the rest of the stuff. I do not want nor need a cheap plain glass chillum. I won’t use it. And, it doesn’t offer a darn thing to the box.

Same goes for the Crop Kingz wraps. It appears these are a staple of like, every subscription smoker box on the planet, and at this point I could roll a blunt daily for the rest of my life and never run out. Please stop sending these. All of you. Stop it.

Similarly, the dino carrying bag to store my dino pipe in is fine, I guess — but why in the world would I store my amazeballs pipe in it when I could display it on the shelf instead? And, other than a carrying or storage bag, it has no use. So it seems lame that it would count as an item.

And, we also have the Art of Smoke blunt carrying case. I don’t think that’s the actual name of it, to be fair, but I don’t know what to call it. Anyway, it’s also dumb. I put my joints in a freaking plastic tube like the rest of the world. I am not packing a mini suitcase for my weed. That’s way too extra.

Other than that, there was a tiny plastic dino and a dino sticker, neither of which should count as one of the seven items, so I’m not even going there. I like the sticker, but… nah. That said, I wouldn’t have cared if they sent bags of dirt as my other items, as long as I got that sweet ass dino pipe. That thing made every other dumb item in the box palatable for me. I love it.

And that, my friends, is why this box gets 15 out of 5 Juicy J rolling papers from me. That dino pipe. Let me have ALLLLLLL the dino friends to go with it.

Had that pipe not been in the box, you’d be getting a whiny review like you did last month with the Elevated Stash box.

But, since SensiBox hooked me up with the best pipe I’ve ever seen, they get a pass. If next month’s box is anywhere near as awesome as this one, well, I’ll be a happy camper indeed.

Rawr.

I’m not sure how any other box could outdo what SensiBox did with that one little blue dino, but I guess we’ll see next month, when we’re back at it with another smoker box review. Here’s to hoping they find a way to outdo a dino. Not sure that’s possible, but who knows. Anything is possible.

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