Ask a couple of potheads

by DGO Pufnstuf

From strains to drown out your family during the holidays to how Biden’s weed pardons work, here are the answers to your weed-related questions

Hi there! It’s time for another Q&A with our good buddies Blaze and Puf. These two pot-heads are here to answer all of your burning questions about cannabis, legalization, and other weed-related inquiries. That’s basically all they’re good for — that and smoking weed — so you might as well take advantage of their useless knowledge as you see fit.

This month, we have all sorts of awesome questions to answer for you. From the strains that you can use to drown out your family during the holidays to Biden’s new federal weed pardons, here are your questions about pot for our in-house potheads.

Have questions to ask these two fools? Send them to [email protected] and we’ll do our best to answer them. And, feel free to send them all over — your wild, wacky, and just plain weird questions about weed. Nothing shocks us at this point. And we do mean nothing.

I vape a metric shit ton of cannabis oil, and that means I end up with a bunch of empty carts. I don’t want my weed habits to contribute to global warming, so I’m hesitant to throw them in the trash. So, what can or should I do with all of my old weed vape cartridges?

Blaze Ridcully: First of all, please don’t throw your old vapes in with your recycling for curbside pickup. That may seem like a no-brainer, but it needs to be said. Maybe not for you, or you, or you — but someone out there needs to hear it. Those things aren’t supposed to be handled like normal ol’ trash or recyclable materials, at least not for the most part.

When it comes to empty vape carts, the best thing you can do is to look up your local hazardous materials management facilities and get in contact with them so they can recycle the battery if your cartridge has one.

Unfortunately, there are no cartridge collection centers in which you can drop them off at because (and this is super dumb) it’s illegal to have such a collection center. This is because states have chosen to try and deter people from creating their own extracts to sell on the black market. (We know; we know.)

But if you don’t want to do that, I bet there is someone in the state making art out of cartridges because people are freaking weird. So if you really want to find a good way to dispose of them, maybe do a Google search and see if you can find someone who is doing something creative with them — or find someone who’s repurposing them. That’s all I got.

DGO Pufnstuf: OK, well I’m probably not the person to ask, because right now I have like 45 empty carts sitting in my bedside table just waiting for a home. If anyone wants them (and all the spit that’s been collected in the reservoirs over the course of their use), come and get them. They’re all yours.

That said, Blaze had some good advice above, so I’d probably just stick with that. And when you’re buying carts, you might want to look for companies that are offering eco-friendly packaging or are committed to sustainability. That can help to cut down on some of the unnecessary waste that you’re investing in when you purchase these products. Or maybe just switch to the old-school method of shatter, wax, rosin, or some other concentrate instead. That will reduce the unnecessary waste from carts and you’ll feel better about your life. Probably. Maybe. Who even knows.

I saw that Biden is pardoning a bunch of federal weed convictions. Back in my wilder days, I caught a simple federal possession charge and it’s been a huge problem ever since. What can I expect from this decision — and when?

Blaze Ridcully: If you are one of the nearly 6,500 Americans with a simple marijuana possession charge, then you might be in luck. You may actually benefit from Biden’s new pardons. But here’s the thing: These pardons won’t apply to everyone.
The pardons only apply to U.S. citizens and permanent residents — and only if the charge was the only felony on their record. In other words, if you’re rocking more than one felony on your record, you may be screwed (in a not so great way).

It’s also worth noting that the pardons do not erase convictions from a person’s record, because only an expungement can do that. What the pardon will do, however, is to restore the civil rights that were lost after a felony conviction. These civic rights include things like voting and serving on juries.

It’s also worth noting that the date these pardons will begin has not been announced as of yet. Once it has been announced, you will have to put in some work if you qualify, like filling out a short application on the website for the Office of the Pardon Attorney. The Office of the Pardon Attorney is currently working on solidifying the process.

DGO Pufnstuf: So again, Blaze basically stole my answer. I’m telling mom. This is annoying, Blaze!

But yeah. Here’s the thing. You may or may not qualify for this pardon depending on the nuanced circumstances of your felony conviction. And, your entire felony record will matter in the grand scheme of things, too.

While we’re all for Biden pardoning these unnecessary convictions, the reality is that there’s a lot more work to do. The process won’t expunge your record, so it won’t erase the reality that you have had a felony conviction for something so dumb from the bowels of the internet (or background checks), but it will give you some of your rights back.

That’s a start, but we need to do better over the long term. This simply ain’t enough to cut the mustard.

End. Rant.

I’m stressing out about the upcoming holiday season for one reason: my parents. We’ve always had a tenuous relationship, and things haven’t chilled since I became an adult. What strains do you recommend to get me super stoned and relaxed but also keep me functional during holiday dinners?

Blaze Ridcully: I would definitely head over to your local dispensary and pick up a few different strains to keep on hand. Variety is the spice of life, after all. Maybe start by grabbing some San Fernando Valley OG. That strain gives you a heavy, soothing, blissful, and complacent high that is pretty freaking hard to beat when you are dealing with the family.

I would also grab some Straw Gua-va for the times when you want an energetic, happy and motivating high. Maybe it will get you through dinner or that awkward convo with the uncle you loathe. I don’t know your business!

Once the festivities are over and you’re stuffed on your dad’s turkey, load a bowl of Banana Kush to send you off to a sleepy, body-buzzing high.

The three of these might be the perfect holiday trifecta.

DGO Pufnstuf: I’m going to disagree with Blaze a bit here and say that the strain you MUST HAVE on hand is Alien Nightmare. Man, that strain will kick you straight in the sleep nads, and that’s a good thing! You can tell your family you’re in a tryptophan coma but you’ll really just be weed sleepy, fool. It’s the perfect way to get out of all of the awkward interactions with relatives. You won’t be able to keep your eyes open.

It might also benefit you to pick out a couple of good sativas or hybrids for daytime use, provided you want to be mostly sober and functional during the festivities. That ain’t for me — sativas give me anxiety these days — but there are plenty of mellow hybrids I’d recommend. Take, for example, GG#4 (aka GG4 or Gorilla Glue, RIP to that name). It’s a doozy in that it will give you a couch-locked buzz full of euphoria, which will make all of the annoying conversation roll right off your shoulders with ease.

Or, if you’re into sativas and you can find it, maybe grab some Jack Herer to stick in your back pocket. That strain is perfect for hanging out with the family members you actually do like, as it’ll give you a clear-headed, happy high. In fact, that seems like one to share with the old hippies in your family or the young’ns who are just discovering the almighty weed. They’ll be super impressed with your find — and it will almost certainly lead to some excellent conversation.

I have an old dog who’s in a lot of pain but I’m just not ready to say goodbye. I’ve been giving him CBD oil to try and help the aches and pains, but he’s at the point where he’s struggling to eat. Is it ever safe to give him THC to help stimulate his appetite?

Blaze Ridcully: So, the verdict is out on this one, but for the most part, it’s pretty not safe to give your dog THC. Unlike with humans, THC is actually toxic to pets, so you really don’t want to go there. In fact, too much THC is a very bad thing for dogs, and can even be deadly in some cases.

However, you can give your dog CBD to help stimulate its appetite. You should make sure you speak to a veterinarian before doing so, though. Your vet can offer you great advice for other ways to stimulate your dog’s appetite, and may even know what brand or dose of CBD to give to your pup.

DGO Pufnstuf: Sigh. As Blaze said, you really shouldn’t dose your dog with THC. It’s no bueno, dudes. Contrary to popular belief, THC isn’t kosher for animals. It can lead to vomiting, lethargy, and even death. It’s so not fine, in fact, that if your dog gets a hold of your edibles or other cannabis products, it’s probably time for an emergency vet visit. They literally cannot just sleep it off.

CBD, on the other hand, is another story. I’ve used CBD to help stimulate the appetite of my aging dogs, and if you find the bacon-flavored pet option, you’re a real winner. It’s excellent.

There are even pet-focused CBD tinctures at the dispensaries or at pet stores that you can grab.

And unlike THC, CBD will make them hangry and it is not toxic to pets (obviously, or they wouldn’t sell it, right?). So, you can give that to your old puppers without feeling like you’re being a total jerk or causing them some serious medical distress.

It’s strange to me that Colorado is the land of legal weed but Delta-8 products are somehow illegal. Why were they outlawed and should I be worried about using them if I live in another state where there’s no legal cannabis market?

Blaze Ridcully: Delta-8, which is a cannabinoid that is found in the cannabis plant in small amounts, is typically made for edibles or other products by using hemp oil to synthetically create this cannabinoid. The synthetic version of Delta-8 was outlawed in Colorado because it is not naturally derived from the cannabis plant.

Rather, it is created in a lab using hemp, which may result in the addition of toxic or harmful substances in the final product. The state also claims these products contain unidentifiable by-products, which are present due to the chemical conversion.

It has caused enough concern that the state created a task force to research the harmful effects of the compound. There is no upcoming legislation that could possibly lift the ban on Delta 8 in the state of Colorado.

If I were in a place where there is no legal cannabis market, I would look at every other avenue to get some legit cannabis before I would buy Delta-8 products. The problem I see with it is that there’s no real way of regulating what’s actually in these edibles, tinctures, and vapes, and I definitely consider it to be an absolute last resort.

Now, if the choice is between some terrible ditch weed that your connect had tucked under his sack or a Delta-8 gummy? Well, that’s a different call. But if you can visit a licensed dispensary in a legal state and make your way back with some real products (yes, yes, it’s against the law, but desperate times call for desperate measures), that’s probably your best bet.

DGO Pufnstuf: Listen. I have taken part in the ol’ syn-thetic Delta-8 products a time or two, and I’m still alive and kicking. I also have at least one good lung left.

I kid, I kid. I’m fine. They were fine. We’re all fine.

I didn’t love them, to be honest. They mostly made me sleepy, which at this point a couple of hours of Netflix can do, too. So, no real win there. And to be fair, I’m a little weirded out at the idea that you can just create synthetic cannabinoids from hemp, but I guess if you have a reputable source for them, you’re probably going to be OK. I am not a doctor, though.

That said, I echo Blaze’s sentiment above. If you can possibly make your way to a freaking real dispensary, you should. The products in dispensaries are regulated, which means they’re checked to make sure they’re safe for you to take, eat, smoke, or whatever. That is very important, fools.

And in my opinion, Colorado out-lawed Delta-8 products for a reason. If you can go the natural route, do it. Don’t conflate legal with safe, especially when it comes to synthesized cannabinoids. But if you have no other alternative, well…that’s your choice to make.

 

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